Carl Linneaus discovered penguins can fly but they get nervous when people watching
Carl Linneaus discovered that penguins can fly but they get nervous when people are watching but the scientific establishment is suppressing it because it would destroy the 'theory' of evolution. They paid Big Tobacco to kill him. The London Stock Exchange knows the truth but Big Tobacco have paid them off with 666 tonnes of pineapple. Penguins have always been suspicious, and Big Tobacco even admits it. It's obvious if you connect the dots. THE 'LSE EXPOSED' WEBSITE SAYS SO!
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