Clothes sentient

Clothes are sentient but nobody believes me because Monsanto is controlling people's minds with Jewish space lasers. The Secret Order of the Knights of the Round Table were originally opposed to this but they're now in on it. I know because the Knights have included it in their manifesto, and there was something about it on Tumblr.

This web page produces random false conspiracy theories solely for the purpose of entertainment. The above contents are likely to be fake, fraudlent, nonsensical, and untruthful. If you find that the produced conspiracy theory is true, please report it as a bug.

This web page is based on the Perl library Acme::ConspiracyTheory::Random by Toby Inkster.